Once an interviewer said to me, “I don’t get it. You work in a department store and you call yourself a writer, what’s that all about? You’re never going to be taken seriously.” And I said, “Well I think that if Virginia Woolf had had a job working the scarf counter at Harrods a couple of days week, she would have gotten out of the house, and had her staff discount, and she probably wouldn’t have gotten so moribund!” Whenever I see films about the Bloomsbury Group I think, “Retail would have helped these people so much!” They were disappearing up their own asses. They should have gotten a job slicing ham in the food court.

                         - Simon Doonan

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